Parents
So, my parents are back from Haiwaii as of yesterday. I never thought I'd say that its nice to have them home. Not because I need them to do stuff, or because I particularly missed them more than normal, but it just is nice that they're back and feeling relaxed.
Its really fun to hang around with my parents when they arent being commanding and uptight. Its also very fun to be with my parents when they arent being political, because I dont really agree with their political views anymore :P
Its also nice because they got me stuff I wanted from Haiwaii! :)
I dont know, everything is kinda just nice right now. Anyways, i'm gonna go shopping to get some clothes for my sisters wedding reception tomorrow. I think I'm gonna wear purple! My dad frowned at that, but pfft, what does he know about style? :P
Idealism
I'm quite an idealistic person, and everyone always tells me how it is good to be idealistic. I'm labelled the "Idealistic student". Of course, I'm ensured its not a bad thing, but simply something that everyone once was. Thats a little sad, that everyone was once idealistic until they were broken and shattered and conformed to society.
I'm not the most materistic person either, but people seem to think if I become a lawyer, of course I will. Why? Because of the money, its too hard to turn down. I'd turn into a lawyer for profit, no morals nothing, just a completely systematic person. Sad...
I look around at the people I see, and even the people on TV (yes, I'm aware this isnt accurate, but its a reflection of what some of our society thinks, so it has some validity to it), and I see how people treat other people, I see what people think, and its because they're grown, matured, and accepted that everyone else is being selfish, or doing whatever, so its fine. And to a degree its fine, because society is like that, so why not? Its easy, its what most people do, and I dont blame anyone for doing it, its normal.
Its sad, but its normal. To see that everyones shattered hopes have changed them. Their experiences in the world have changed them. Not for better, not for worse...they're just not idealistic. You can call it a loss of innocence, or whatever you want, but its still sad to me.
A lot of this (I think) comes from working and money. Everyone works hard for their money, and with that money, you get more power and you feel superior to those without money. Not because you want to, just because thats how it happens. I remember before I worked, I thought..."Those poor homeless people...they all must have such unfortunate circumstances." Then I got a job, and worked for money. The next homeless person I saw I thought..."Why cant you get a job and work? Work like the rest of us! Its not that hard, just do it! Get off your butt and do it! Why do I want to support you?"
Everything changed, it was weird, I understand the point of view of so many other people now. I still understand that there are many homeless that do go through lots of unfortunate circumstances and are now stuck. So I guess I have become less idealistic than I used to in this short period of time. I'd still like to help them, but I still think that some dont deserve the help if they're able to work on their own. Others definately would benefit and appreciate the help...
I dont know where I'm going with this...I was just thinking about how everyone tells me that they were once idealistic, and now they think about themselves and care more about their families. Again, nothing wrong with that...but I dont want to turn out like that, its not for me.
I'm going to try to always be idealistic, always try to be nice and helpful and selfless. This may die one day...I hope it doesnt, and I hope I can prove to myself that there are people who can stay good and helpful in this world, because I'm no different from any Tom, Dick or Harry out there.
Ahh...the idealism oozes from this little blog even...
Volleyball!
Ohhh!! Had sooo much fun tonight!
I was planning on a nice night at home with some relaxing sleep and such, but then my sister got a call and some people called her to play indoor beach volleyball, and she was like, Brad wana come? And course I did! So we went and had sooo much fun!
Played some really good people!! It was great!! Too bad we only tied the second team 2 games to 2 games. The first we beat :) My team got tired though, cept for me and Dana~~
Man, I love beach volleyball, made some awesome dives!!
Awww well, time to sleep, gonna go to the beach sometime next next week too with work people! That should be really fun, though I dont think they play volleyball, but still be fun to run around and play frizbee or something :)
Anyway, sleep now, work tomorrow.
Gays
Man, why do some gays gota give the rest such a bad stereotype?
I know a few that are quite man-bitches, the rest are perfectly normal people! But then only the man-bitches are recognized because they're very...noticable. I mean, there's this one guy, a huge man-bitch, I thought he was gonna be alright when I started talking to him. But then he gets super offensive and he's not even joking. And even if he were joking, it wasnt a good moment to, nor did he know me well enough to. Tactless, simply tactless.
I'm thinking Will and Grace arent too far off on their portral of gays. Will is rather 'normal' aside from his obsessions about cleaning and stuff. Of course on TV everything is super exaggerated, so if you tone it down a bit, it seems not to be too far off. Then there's Jack, he's a huge flaming pile of homo. He's self-centred, and vain, and all that stereotypical stuff gays are. Tone it down a bit and you have your real stereotyped gay. Kinda sad I think.
If you wana look at Queer As Folk, (another gay show) you'll see crazy sex-a-holics. I think thats a huge stereotype too. I dont think that all gays are crazy about sex. Some have a very low sex drive.
Well, I'm just irritated with all the stereotypes going around, about anything. Just gays today are particularly irritating me. Namely that dude that was all about the "I'm better than you" kinda vibe. I know I shouldnt be irritated with that, but I'd like the world to be all happy and stuff, so of course I'm going to be irritated when there arent nice people.
So ya, I'm going to go to work to check my schedule and do some planning for the beach! WEeeee~
Sweet Beach Party~!
So it seems that me and some friends from work are planning a beach party! It sounds like its gonna be a lot of fun!! I'm excited, I hope we can pull it off! ^^
Mm...excitment :)
Also gota find out when I'm moving into my res...that would be nice. Mental note: Call residence tomorrow.
Oh damn, I gota pick out my courses too! ARgh!! Life decisions...hard hard hard...
"How Blogging Ruined My Life"
So I read this article called "
How Blogging Ruined My Life" from
The Village Voice. I really thought it was absurd.
The reasons were really random and lame. I think Whitney Pastorek (the author) and her friends take blogging WAY too seriously. So her first reason that blogging ruins her life is that...
1. No one shows up for anything anymore.
She seems to think that once you post on the blog that an event is happening, everyone is expected to read it and is therefore expected to go to the event. Or at least thats what I got out of it, correct me if I'm wrong. But I think thats absurd because you shouldnt expect people to read your blog. I know I dont, so I cant just post things on there for people and expect that they had time to read it. Maybe her friends arent doing it the way that most of us do it, but then I'd have to say that they are idiots for using blogs like that.
2. No one tells me anything anymore.
I think this reason is lame also because if someone posts something on their blog, it doesnt mean that they still dont want to talk about it. I know whenever someone I know posts something on their blog, we talk about it further and in detail and you can ask them about it. Good examples are when people post blogs when they're upset. It gives you a window of opportunity to ask them about it. You can read it and be concerned them call them up and say "I just read your blog, are you alright? Do you want to talk?" It makes communication easier for me, maybe her friends dont do it like that, but then I think they are taking blogs WAY too seriously.
3. No one has fights anymore.
She seems to think that people will simply just 'de-link' her instead of working out their problems. This to me, has nothing to do with blogs. You can stop calling her without a blog and it'd have the same effect. And if they do stop linking you (which by the way, I think is the wrong way to say that, because linking isnt something you really do to a blog, but whatever, it was her choice of words) then you can call them up and ask them about it and the fight will ensue shortly after. Problem solved.
4. No one invites me to anything anymore.
Here she seems to think that bloggers throw parties for other bloggers. This idea in itself is really out there. I mean...WAY out there. Who the hell does this? If people actually do this...it would make me sad to think there are such freaks in the world. Blogger only parties...HAH!
5. They have created a new world order.
What have you been smoking?
So she concludes by saying that blogging has ruined her life because she has to keep up with everyone's blogs so much that she is losing sleep, not doing her work and such.
I'd have to tell her that her friends are freaks if they are SO obsessed with blogging, and that she needs to ditch them right now, because if she's losing sleep, and not keeping up with her work because she has to read her friends blogs, its not worth it.
I dont understand why people would use blogs like that? I use mine to think, to post an opinion for those who want to read it. I use it to just get my thoughts out, not necessarily for other people to see, but for myself. I'm sorrie that blogging has ruined your life Whitney, but I think you kinda let it by subjecting yourself to that. Not to be unsympathetic, but you really gota move on from those friends that are obsessed with crazy blogging, cause people that obsessed about anything...cant be healthy.
Just my two cents.
Hmm..
Just some nice random thoughts going on in my head.
Things are going good without the parentals around. Had a really nice talk with Dana today, about pretty much everything? Well, cept one thing I wanted to talk to her about...I'll find a way though.
Anyways, I've been thinking a bit the last little while...about what I want to do with my life, where I want to go, what I want to do, before course selection is due...I'm not sure anymore? There are so many things I want to do, so many possiblities. Not to toot my own horn, but I am honestly a smart guy, not the smartest ever, but a smart guy.
To be honest, I'm afraid to study though. I havent ever hardcore studied in my whole life so far. I've always been distracted by something because I've been afraid. Sad to let fear keep me from doing more than I could...but I've figured that I've done so well without studying well...what would happen if I tried and didnt do well? I know, its childish of me to be so afraid, and I have to conquer this fear and actually study while I'm at UofT.
I'm afraid because I feel that I wont do better, and that 82% is the best of my ability. I'm afraid that I wont be great...but thats absurb because everyone is great in their own way I know...but I just want to be able to do really well in school. I hope I can hold it all together...I'll try, I promise myself I will try.
I also talked to my sister about responsiblity. This made me remember lots of old times in high school. I never realised that I had to be so responsible...and why I had to be. Its so weird...I think I'm too passive though. I let people form their moulds and casts of themselves and flow with'em. I let them think that they are something and let them think that I'm something else...these are just a bunch of random things I've been thinking about...sorrie, bare with me.
I've also been thinking about the "Online Universe" that has been created by games and stuff that I've been playing. It makes me sad to see some people that go CRAZY over it and take it as if it were real life. To a certain degree, it is real, but then to another degree it is completely false. For those who cant read body langauge or tone of voice, then yes, it is real...but then with simple stage directions, you can create an atmosphere that makes you seem like something you really arent. It is really a nice escape from the real world, but it isnt really the real world, but it is...
Follow me here? I might not be making the most sense right now, its late...okay...lets see if I can articulate this a little better...so on this online game my friends and I play, there are guilds and such to go hunting with or to fight with or to go to the arena with and kill other guilds etc etc etc. So my guild that my friends and I created a while back slowly dies and people care less and whatever, except for one guy. He's totally going mad because the guild is falling apart and to him, its a family. He really doesnt have many friends in real life, so he admitly turns to the game. He feels like the guild is his family and I feel bad because he has no friends in real life, so I talk to him and try to help him out with the guild when I am around or not hunting to level up my character. Its crazy, because he's so into it, but I understand that he needs it...but he takes it WAY too seriously. We had a guild meeting to assess where the guild was headed and whats going on, and he was trying to lead it, but a lot of us were goofing off and laughing and having fun and such, so the guy got mad and stormed out. He whispered us later saying how mad he was that we werent taking things seriously and blahb labh lbhablhab.
He's one type of gamer I see a lot of. The ones that are shy, or anti-social, or misunderstood, or unaccepted by society. Then there are those who play the game simply just to play the game and have fun. That would be me and Grace and some others. Others meet people on the game and try to have fun in real life with them...Its just weird...this whole online thing is weird and I cant explain my thoughts on it properly.
Its good for a temporary escape, to just play around, chill and talk, but not to create a new society that accepts you. Thats just strange and makes you something else.
I'm not even sure where I'm going with this. Its just that guy in the guild was crazy mad and sad when the guild started defending people he was attacking because he was mad. He was so mad because his little society crashed on him...and its just sad, so very sad...
I hope he recovers...and I hope I dont have to deal with that anymore, I've done that a time too many.
Woah!
Spiderman 2...
That was a great movie. If I were to describe it with one word, I would say its inspiring.
It reminded me of things...things I thought I had forgotten. It kinda hit me in the right place...Aside from the flashy effects, good script, good story, good acting and such, it hit me in the heart. Reminded me that even though things can suck, it doesnt mean you dont have to do the right thing.
Of course, my experiences were never like spiderman's, I dont save the world, nor do I save people or really anything, but you still should be selfless even though people arent despite the fact that you have to give up things. We may not have 'great power' but we do have great responsiblity. It is understandable that people would want to shaft their responisiblity to be good people, nice people who care about one another for your own gains. It is perfectly understandable, as it is for spiderman to want to give it up so he can live a normal life and care about himself. I dont blame people for not caring about others, or being selfless, its just a part of life that you have to accept. However, this doesnt necessarily mean that I should shaft my responsibility..rather...my duty to be nice and kind to people despite whatever may come.
So maybe I havent been the nicest person in the world recently, not that I've been the meanest, but I certainly have not been the nicest I could be. So, fine, I give, I return to the preachie person I once was, minus the preaching. :)
New Stuff
Looks like I'll have a new website as of tomorrow care of U of T.
This should be interesting, I will also have a new e-mail that I'd probably check more cause I dont have to log onto ICQmail.com and I can just pop open Outlook Express :)
Not too sure what to do with the new website though...I'm thinking of putting up a flash site about...something. We'll see :)
But anyway, my new e-mail will be up tomorrow, and its..
brad.young@utoronto.ca
my new site will be...not sure ;P
Sickkkkknesssss :(
ya, so I'm grossly sick. Feeling better today, and I actually ate solid food today :)
It seems everyone is getting sick in my family. Marc and Karen are sick, Dana is sorta sick, my dad is sorta sick.
In other news, there is really no other news? Everything is just the same as usual, hanging out, playing games, working, balhb albh albhablah blahbalbh.
I'm bored right now sitting at home sick, so I type on my blog. Lalalala
bored bored bored bored.
Okay, i go find something productive to do. :)
Woah!
Hahhaa, I havent blogged in a while!
So, whats been up? A whole lot has been up. No time to blog even, which I find a little strange, cause normally I made time to blog?
Mm...Well, good news, I got a raise at work :) 7.50 an hour + tip, GO ME! hahaha :P
A few people are getting fired randomly, I feel bad for them, but at least I know my job is secure now that I have keys to the place and my boss loving me and such.
Oh! Pride! That was really fun :)
To be honest, I thought the day was gonna suck, it started out bad, I wasnt as prepared as I had wanted to be, but it turned out to be great anyway~ People I wasnt so sure about, turned out to be alright. Things were really fun~ Minus the creeps in the clubs hitting on me. I mean...Hi, I dont enjoy complete strangers touching me in 'intimate' places thanks. Not THOSE places, but right under your arm? Or maybe your lower back? Uncool. Unless of course you're super hot like the polar ice float, hahahahahahh!
Ahh...at least I didnt notice people with video cameras this year, just scary people with cameras, but I'm used to that now -_-
Mm...what else...oh ya.
Matt wasnt the person I was expecting. He's actually a nice guy, at least I didnt pick up any bad 'vibes' or whatever from him, so its all good.
Mm, after and before that, there's just a bunch of random hanging out. Nothing out of the ordinary. I'm excited to go to Catherine's cottage sometime later :)
And though I worked Canada day, it was really funnie with Jo and her tarot cards, Biona and her cell, david and his tiny fireworks, and Grace and I with our sparklers! LOL. If anyone was driving on warden/hollingham around 12am on Canada Day, you probably saw some random sparklers dancing their way home...that would have been me and Grace. hahahahah!
Anyways, I should get back to cleaning, as I have a large party for my sister tomorrow. pEace~!
