Just one of those days.
Not a shaft day, but not a good day.
I'm so very tired...and I still havent really touched my lab report. I've done the first page...and some of the 2nd page, but I dont feel like the rest. I know I'll do it, but the problem is just how much sleep am I going to get?
Should I risk handing something in? Or get a late penalty and do more on it later. I've never actually handed something in late before...at least not intentionally like this. What is going on...?
Work and school is hard to balance, with sickness attached to boot. I've gotta try harder, but how do you try harder when you feel like you're out of energy? Even that little boost that you get before you burn out completely feels like its gone. I just want to sleep...but sleep doesnt solve this lab...which is sorta interesting actually, but retarded, and I should have started earlier! *kicks self*
Oh well, its only...10% of my mark...damnit, thats quite a bit.
OKAY, time to stop talking and feeling like an idiot and try to work despite all that...
Note to self: Time management courses needed.
Brad's Politics Corner.
So just reading the newspaper today, and I felt like commenting.
So firstly, we'll start off with this battle with the United States over the Arctic. They seem to no believe that it is part of Canada, and "many other countries agree" so they say. I'm glad Harper said that the mandate comes from the people of Canada, and not from outside countries. Go Harper on that one, at least you stood up to the US.
So although that gave Harper a tiny point in my book, he lost more because he's trying to reverse the same-sex marriage legislation already. They say that 45% of the MP's elected monday will support the free-vote. Harper predicts that more will support it once he talks to them. Sigh. Let's hope it stays at 45%.
For the Liberals, they are thinking about appointing Scott Brison as the interim leader, but that would not allow him to run for leadership of the liberals later on. Why does this matter? Well, Scott Brison is an ex-conservative who left them in 2003 shortly after Steven Harper became the leader. He is also the first openly gay cabinet minister. Liberals are thinking this is the best way to show their progressive politics to face the Conservatives.
Now for the Head tax talk...I dont know if I really want to type this because it really does make me cry when I think about how much shit the Chinese-Canadians of 1885 - 1947 put up with. The shit my Grandfather and Grandmother had to put up with. To think that people dont think that an apology is warrented...is just unbelievable. Chinese people werent allowed to vote or go to University. Railroad workers were paid $1.50/day and expected to buy food and accomodation with that. The head tax made $23million in Canada those years, $23million in 1885 - 1947! Thats a shit load of money now, and the Canadian government, rather, the liberals, said they would give $2.5million, and the National Congress of Chinese Canadians accepted. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU ACCEPT THAT. WHAT THE FUCK... So anyway, the Last Spike will hopefully be in a musuem somewhere soon. Right now it's travelling around Canada. It pisses me off that RIGHT after the railroad was completely they were like, "Well, we're done with the chinese, bring in the chinese exclusion act!". You dont just use and abuse a race of people like slaves and then say they're not allowed to come here anymore.
FUCK, i'm so mad and very sad right now. But at least there are people out there still fighting for their compensation, and I support them. I almost want to join them, I'll do some research first.
More stress!
Yes, more stress, but stress I bring on myself to try and organize things better, because the more activities I have to do, the less I have to work on weekends which allows me to have time to do things I want on the weekends (ie. volunteer/volleyball or something).
So I signed up for Volleyball at school again, hopefully they dont fuck it up...AGAIN. And I also signed up to be my class rep for GGR203 and help planning social gatherings and such for UT Geology students, which will also motivate me to be more active in my geology studies because I wont want to look stupid infront of all those geology students...hahaha.
In other news, I had a day shift today in work, which made me immensely happier with my job. I really just hate working night shifts. I hope to also do some volunteer with Josephine at PMH, and I was thinking maybe at the Unionvilla. I havent decided yet, lots of time for that though.
Still job hunting...my shoulder hurts quite a bit right now for some odd reason. I think I need a massage pretty badly.
Okay, before February I'll also try to fit in a guild event for the WoWers, cause there are so many new people and I want them to all get to know each other and mingle...so I'll see what I can do with that...hammer out the details between classes.
So...now my schedule is filled up-ish, and I can concentrate on this craziness.
Stressy.
So my weekend is gone, plans got fucked over again and again and again and again, and again.
So what are my plans now? My plans are to plan for things just myself. I'm not blaming people for my plans falling through, it just kinda happened because things are so busy right now. So really, my plans are now just going to be for myself. I havent really had time to myself in a while being all around these passed few weeks. I wish I could just relax, but work eats my weekend and school works fills the rest of that because I want to get a head start on assignments.
I feel pretty fed up with somethings that happened today. It was mostly uncontrolable and my own stupidity, so I can only blame myself and just fate. Today was another of my famous "Shaft Days", but I can deal with it, I'll just have to do things more on my own I figure, and more for myself. Definately a balance between doing what I want, and doing what other people want is going to be looked for.
I think I'm going to be more honest with my feelings now, and not just suck it up when I dont like something and just say it. No more of this bottling of emotions, okay, not true, some will definately remained bottled for self-control purposes, but for the most part, I will be more honest in the sense of letting people know when I dont like something.
Anyways, it's time to try and sleep, so I can try to do work tomorrow, before I go to work work.
I'm also afraid Steven Harper will be winning the election...
Sometimes I want to stab myself in the eye, too bad my damn eyes are too small and I'd miss and just stab my face...boo.
Scuse me, while I cry and then go and stab myself.
Holy shit...
Elections really do make me sad...I'm sitting here reading the Toronto Star and reading some of the things the conservatives are saying...some of the views their MP's have...and it makes me want to vomit.
One MP, David Sweet, said "There's a reason jesus only called men. It's not because women aren't co-participaters. Jesus knew women would naturally follow." I just am so very baffled by this thought process. God fucking damn, GOD FUCKING DAMN! I mean...yes, you know Jesus personally, and I'm sure thats exactly why he did that, if he even did that!... If conservatives get in...say goodbye women's rights. I would go on about this...but I cant even express how very stupid it is...:(
Sadly, Harper's defense to that was "It's a charter right to be christian in this country." So what, that means he believes that women are meant to follow to?! And he's leading in the polls?! WHY!!! WHY WOULD ANY WOMEN VOTE FOR HIM!?...My brain hurts.
Then there's this whole thing about the Liberal appointed judges that are social activists. I think Harper is just trying to confuse the public and scare them because they dont know much about our judical system. If I remember correctly, judges are appointed by the Prime Minister only as a formality. They are chosen by a council of Judges (or something like that...but nothing that is ascribed to any political party) who then give the final list to the Prime Minister to choose. So really, it holds the views of the Judges that were appointed a long time ago, which is from every government. After that, the Judges are detached from politics and are encouraged to stay seperate from politics and stay individuals since the Prime Minister has little power over the judges. Harper seems to be trying to ascribe the Judges to political parties to scare people into thinking that the liberals are dominating and its time to change that thought because these judges who care about social justice (that the conservatives dont believe in) are evil. I'm sad.
So a nice other view of one of the Conservative MP's is...(Harold Albrecht)
"These same-sex marriages would succeed in wiping out an entire society in one generation."
WHAT THE FUCK!? Because with these marriages...EVERYONE in Canada is going to stop having children. WHAT THE FUCK!?...How do these stupid people end up runnning for MP positions. A better question is actually how do people actually end up voting for them.
So there are 34 tory candidates with extreme social agenda's according to the Star. It's kind of funny to see some radical Christian views on this...from McLey or something like that (He's the President of Canadian Christian College, and also the President of the faith/moral-based Canada Family Action Coalition, and a writer in the Evangelical Christian Magazine) who seems to think that under the "liberal elites" we will have "legal prostitution, legal brothels and legal drugs." Because the liberals ALWAYS advocate their stance on legalizing all drugs, prostitution and brothels. Now...my question is how are you the president of all these things, and yet so stupid. Or maybe he's smart in feeding this information to the faith-based christians who will follow whoever is in charge blindly? Okay that was mean, not all christians are like that, I know quite a few that are smarter than that, I'm just being mean and mad.
Oh I almost forgot that Conservative's might be putting abortion up to a free vote because they want no abortion under any circumstances, even if the mother's life is in danger. Goodbye again women's rights, I will miss you.
What is the world coming to...so anyway, time to go cry and stab myself before the election on monday. Hell, anything is better than this right?
Sometimes I forget.
I let my hopeful idea of somethings blind me. I see things the way I'd like to see them a lot of the time.
I should really just stop caring, hahha. But I remember someone once told me...
Your caring is your greatest strength, and your greatest weakness.
How true...how true. Sucks that I cant stop caring, I need to be shot or something.
Trouble Sleepin'
I duno why, things on my mind...cant get them out.
I have problems bottling some of my feelings. I really do.
Apology for head-tax eh?
So it looks like the government is finally getting around to apologizing for the Chinese Exclusion Act way back in the day. It's kinda unclear whether or not they will be paying people back, I'm assuming not. At least an apology will be given as the Conversatives, NPD and Bloc have all said they were going to, which forces the Liberals to redress their former no-apology thing. Thank god. I'd like to see how this plays out, I'm glad that this is finally happening seeing as my mom's side had to pay that damn tax and live through some hard times because of that. I mean, with 9 children and having to spend all your money to get into the country...where the hell does that leave you? Working on the railroad where so many chinese people died.
So really, there better damn well be an apology, but I want a sincere apology rather than one forced on by the Liberals. In the paper today they showed that most of the high populated chinese-canadian areas (hahah, they named Markham-Unionville as the first and highest!) were Liberal controlled areas and these votes are signifcant in 22 ridings. So you better damn well apologize Paul Martin. I think I'm voting NDP anyways, though I'm fairly certain they will not win in my riding.
In other news, I'm back at school for the new semester. Went to my first class today at 10am, had intro to climatology. I know you all think my studies are stupid, but meh, I really enjoyed it! My prof was really nice and seemed like he genuinely wanted to teach us which was refreshing. He didnt want to make us spend money to buy a huge expensive textbook, so he photocopied all his slides and all we have to pay is $4. He writes everything on the board and goes through things pretty thoroughly with decent examples. I'm kinda annoyed that it's 3hrs spread through 3 days at 10am...but well, at least it gets me up? hahaha...schedule time for Brad!
Okay, now it's time to go read some fan-fiction...Damn you fatima! DAMN YOU!
Happy New Year and Merry Christmas!
Wow, I havent written anything for a long time. God I've had to work so much and had all this family stuff it feels like I havent seen a lot of people in months. Luckily I get a break today until thursday, so I might head up to Waterloo to see my good buddy Eric...that bastard :P
Hahaha, well, I hope everyone had an amazing new years eve and christmas, I havent really had much of a chance to talk to anyone else either, hahaha. I should re-thank all the people that have gotten me gifts too, because you're all awesome and I love everything I got this year! Thank you so much for thinking of me, you guys rock so hard!
I still havent given everyone their christmas gifts yet...seeing as I havent seen everyone yet. So...people will be getting late christmas presents...though I bought them before Christmas! :(
It's nice to have seen some older friends I havent talked to in a while that came back for Christmas and stuff. I missed you guys!
Anyways, I really gota go shower...so, gimme a call or I'll give you guys a call to see if you wana do anything while I'm free!
Happy New Year!
