Dreams.

Learning from the mistakes of others.

Really quite a useful skill I have there. Listening to what other people do bad, then making a mental note, "Do not do that or else this will happen." Really kinda nice. Also learning from what some people do to others. Some say that they are 'close friends'. Do they mean this? Really, I mean, they've talked to each other for so long, but then something else comes and poof you're suddenly non-existent?

Well, that very well may not be true, and I'm also aware that this is a two way street as I have not made any effort to communicate, but this is almost besides the point. It seems if we are to actually do something, I must be the one to communicate. Why? When we are both good friends? Best even? Same with the other 'best' friends, or so we're called. Granted, two way street, but puh-lease, we can only take so much.

I do sadly learn that you can only be so close with so many people. I struggle between 4 people, I remember struggling between 10 people, and that really didnt work. Now, struggling between 4, and its just as bad. Its a different level of closeness, and its hard to keep when its different groups. Well, I do try to keep in touch with other friends, but its just not possible when you're having so much fun with one group of friends. Then you lose touch with the others and such and such, but I try not to because its an assly thing to do, I've learned this the hard way, over and over.

So why do I struggle still? To be a nice guy? Hurrah. Nice guys finish last, and thats the truth. I havent got the guts/courage to actually tell someone what I think about them. I ask myself why, and my answer is "Because its not nice." or "Because its mean." What the hell kinda reason is that? I dont know.

Many people need a good telling off, and many are going un-told off because people dont want to be 'mean' or want to be 'nice'...bullshit I say.

I think from now on I will try to be more honest and still try to be nice at the same time. You can tell people that they're being stupid and still be nice about it if you use the right words. So this is my new resolution. Go communication. Rah.

posted by Bradimon @ 2:02 a.m.