Dreams.

Well...
Did a lot of thinkin on the subway today...
Also did a lot of research, but thats not what I was really thinkin bout..hahha :P

It was one of those 'life' thinking things. Somewhere in the last few months I've lost my passion for caring about people, and caring about things...well, not exactly lost it, but its been toned down quite a bit. Normally I would insist on helping someone, but now I'm just...tired? Find it a waste of my time? I've been being more selfish as people have told me to do, like studying for my tests instead of talking or helping someone through something, or actually spending more time doing stuff for myself, and less for other people. In that I feel I have lost a part of me that wants to help everyone...not all at once, it was more of a gradual thing...

Point is, that was my purpose in life at the time...and now...I have no purpose? It feels strange...I just simply sit here and do what I want now. And life has become once again...meaningless. Ya...thats a bit of a downer eh? However, I was thinking about this point, and though my life may seem meaningless right now, I know it'll pick up again sometime, its just a matter of patience. I have also decided to try to be happier with what I have, opposed to what I dont have, and I have decided to try to just wait and see how things go, if something good happens, then bonus for me, but if it doesnt, then no big deal, as long as I have my health, my family and friends, I should be happy. Thats a lot more than other people have and I should be greatful.

So my new goal is to become more patient with life, and more accepting of the flaws of the world, but still try to help it out...My passion for helping hasnt totally been diminished :P

posted by Bradimon @ 9:09 p.m.